I had a successful pregnancy over 40 naturally.
It should be encouraging to know that the rate of
unexpected pregnancies in women over 40 is second only to teenagers!
Here are more articles on pregnancy over 40, fertility, and natural conception
There is a profile of women who want to have a baby over 40
I previously ran a women's support group for women and couples struggling with
infertility for my local infertility organization. Most women (and men) were in
their late 30's and 40's and they all started nodding when I spoke about the
"infertility profile". Here are some factors we all seem to have in common - see
if they apply to you:
1. Career Oriented - enjoy being in a high ranking position
2. Delayed marriage and childbearing to pursue career or other personal
3. Somewhat of a perfectionist
4. Perhaps had a less than perfect upbringing or volatile relationship with
parents or family
5. Approval Addict (the need for others to recognize that you're doing a good
6. Hard worker - always meet deadlines and you may sacrifice your needs for your
7. Eventually succeed in everything you do (except getting pregnant - at least
for the time being!)
My problems with infertility stemmed from my childhood
Well, I can say without a doubt that all of the above factors are NOT consistent
with getting pregnant. In hindsight, I can say that many of my problems with
infertility stemmed from my childhood. I was a bit of a forgotten child (even
though most people thought I had a great family) and I spent the rest of my life
trying to prove to everyone how "worthy" I was. I pursued a career in a
responsible position and I was always considered "the best" at whatever I did. I
worked hard at the expense of my health and work became an escape where I didn't
have to face that I wasn't happy with my life. When I wanted to get pregnant, my
previous "mode of operation" didn't work anymore. When you're in the whirlwind
of the corporate pressure cooker, you really don't have time to look within. I
finally had to learn how to put me first and I had to take a good look at
everything I was running from.
Confront the root of your fertility problems
These are some of the major changes I had to make in my life:
1. I quit my high stress job (which wasn't easy since the "golden shackles" had
really built up after 19 years!)
2. I changed my diet - When I worked in the corporate world, I usually had
coffee for breakfast and I gulped my lunch down between crises at work. I
started eating foods that promote hormonal balance and overall health.
3. I started a program of visualization and meditation which not only helped to
reduce my stress level, but it helped me to actually "see" and create my future
4. I confronted my less than perfect childhood and upbringing - I'm convinced
that the root of my fertility problems started when I was an unwanted child born
to parents that were unequipped to deal with another addition to the family.
5. I finally realized that I am "worthy" just because I am. I didn't have to
prove anything to anybody.
If you're trying to conceive and you fit the "profile" I've outlined above, take
a good look at your life. Making changes now could make you a much happier
person and you just might get pregnant!
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Trying To Conceive Over 40, Visualization and Meditation
You Live What You Think
One of the most frustrating situations for women of any age is not being able to get pregnant. Here you have this body
that you have relied on for your entire life, and it's not pulling through for you. You feel like you are doing the right things, staying in shape, eating right, paying attention to your "fertility signals" but nothing. It may surprise you that you have more control than you've been led to believe. You are not a victim, you have the ability to take charge of the situation.
Your mind has to be on board too
Maybe you're missing a critical component. Your mind has to be on board too.
If you've been trying to conceive for a while, you may be saying to yourself,
"I can't get pregnant, maybe I'm infertile". That's the wrong message because
even though you want to get pregnant more than anything, your mind hears:
"Can't get pregnant" and "infertile". It's a small shift, but what you need
to be thinking about is getting pregnant and having a baby.
Although the pain, frustration and downright anger associated with
long-term failure is hard to get through, you need to leave that
behind and focus on a positive outcome.
How do you do this? Visualization and Meditation helps to retrain your mind.
Visualization is picturing in your mind what you want
Visualization is picturing in your mind what you want: a healthy happy baby. Rather than focusing on every detail of the fertilization and pregnancy process, what you need to do is focus on the happy ending and leave the details to work themselves out. If you have ever found yourself daydreaming, then you know how to visualize. It's really quite simple, but we forget how to let go and think about the good stuff as we get older and burdened by life in general. So how do you visualize? If you choose, you can start by picturing in your mind a baby moving through your fallopian tubes and landing softly in your uterus.
This baby will attach firmly and will feel warm and safe where it will grow for the next 9 months. If that seems to microscopic or too difficult, you can just visualize yourself playing with your baby. Imagine the love and the joy you feel as your relish every moment with this miracle of life. Imagine all of the day to day things you will do with your baby. How will you dress them? How will you feed them? See yourself bathing them, putting them to bed and taking them out for a stroll. Talk to your future child. Invite them to come and live their life with you.
Meditation Is When You Think Of Nothing
Meditation, on the other hand is when you think of nothing. Visualization helps you clarify and launches your intentions, but meditation helps you to connect with the all powerful and all knowing force in the universe where all things are possible. Visualization can be done any time or anywhere, but meditation requires a quiet space where you will not be interrupted. Not only will meditation help you to attract those intentions you launched with visualization, but it will also provide relief from the day to day stress which may be keeping your body from getting pregnant in the first place.
Most of us spend our days trying to multitask and our minds are full of chatter trying to juggle three or four things at once. Honestly, when was the last time you actually tried to think of nothing? It's actually a little challenging, but with practice, it is possible. When you meditate, you become an open vessel. You are present in the moment. This allows you to unite with the greater good. You will be surprised how much easier you will move through life when you make this connection with your higher self which is connected to all creation.
Click here for more instructions on meditation and visualization
From My Infertility, Pregnancy Over 40 and Miscarriage Blogs:
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